Musings

Where do people go
When they just disappear?
Their lives but a memory
A dream in the night
Do they become angels
Watching over us by day?
Or are they simply
A figment,
Vanished,
When no one left remembers?

Wait Too Long

Blowing in my ear
Under a cloudless sky
Till the day breaks
 I sit with you, just us
Together worlds away from everyone else
Idyllically
Lounging on the white sand
Lingering by the blue green seas
Believing this can last forever
Eternal, Blissful, peace
Soon-to-be achieved and quick to be forgotten
Or may be carved in stone...
Only if we two vow never to wait too long

Pause

In the shallow light of day
When twilight meets the gloam
When darkened shadows come to play
Making sinking spirits roam

Let's raise a cup of unshed tears
To those we used to call friend
To broken dreams and unspoken fears
To bridges that will never mend

Allow our minds to silent grow
Let burdens be at peace
The world can have it's troubled woes
Or let all thoughts quiesce

As the sun sinks into the land
With heartbeats sounding bold
Together we pause glass in hand
And watch the future unfold

Sedeor

I want to go
Follow the way
Tempted to stray
Go with the flow
But here I sit
____________________________________

Today's not the day
I would know
And be ready to go
Not ready to quit
So still I sit

 ____________________________________

I've hit a new low
It's time to flit
I really must split
I no longer glow
But still I sit

____________________________________

New Endings

New Endings

The lover’s quarrel is amended

Think not that this tale is ended

For unless a parting follows

Love in heartache and bitterness wallows

If only goodness lit the day

We know not night to keep it at bay

And without the loss and touch of pain

We wouldn’t know what we have gained

#lovers, #quarrel, #ammended, #tale, #ended, #parting, #follows, #love, #heartache, #bitterness, #wallows, #goodness, #lit, #day, #night, #bay, #loss, #touch, #pain, #know, #gained, #poem, #poetry, 

Hidden Key

Hidden Key

While we see The floating gossamer dreams elude and move away

They keep at bay From fairy dreams and flying free they change the mood

I must conclude That night will stop the endless day and sand will stop the sea

I now can see By waking dreams we all are wooed then time will pass away

If we stay Our passion’s freedom is the key to life pursued

And being shrewd It lights the path to show the way and shows to us the key

#floating, #gossamer, #dreams, #elude, #fairy, #flying, #change, #mood, #conclude, #night, #day, #sand, #sea, #waking, #wooed, #time, #pass, #passion, #freedom, #key, #life, #pursued, #shrewd, #lights, #path, #show, #way, #key, #hidden, #experimental, #poem, #poetry

Apart

Apart

I tried to fall in love today

And went to give my heart away

But I found a note that read

You stole my heart I’ve taken yours in stead

I thought about it long and hard

Who could be such a callow card?

To take my heart with nary a word?

Not even by a look inferred

Only one name came to mind

The tangled knot, it did unwind

I followed the path where it did lead

To retrieve my heart with utmost speed

But when I reached to bring it back

You grabbed my hand for a change of tack

We fell in to soulful bliss

As we slowly began to kiss

Now I know I have no heart

It has always been apart

With my love it will stay

Until the night becomes the day

#fall, #love, #heart, #stole, #callow, #word, #look, #tangled, #knot, #path, #lead, #retrieve, #hand, #tack, #soulful, #bliss, #kiss, #apart, #night, #day, #poem, #poetry, 

What Men Really Want...

What Men Really Want…

Why must men insist and say

Care not for dress, throw wiles away

Who put it about, who heard it said

A man cares for the looks inside our heads?

But do they mean it, what they say?

Or is it an attempt to gain our bed?

They try to stay two steps ahead

Why must men persist and say…

A loving wife they wish to wed

To laugh and smile all the day

Intelligence should fill their head

Care not for dress, throw wiles away

It’s enough to make a girl see red

To find the original protégée.

Who thought enough to think of a way?

Who put it about, who made it said?

A girl is beautiful for skills she conveys

Not bosoms big, shining hair or lips of red

When that is true, I’ll seize the day

When a man cares for the looks inside our heads!

#feminism, #men, #women, #insist, #care, #dress, #wiles, #looks, #head, #attempt, #bed, #twostepsahead, #persist, #loving, #wife, #wed, #laugh, #smile, #intelligence, #girl, #red, #original, #protégée, #beautiful, #skills, #convey, #bosoms, #big, #shining, #hair, #lips, #red, #true, #seize, #day, #poem, #poetry

Life

Life

Lost ground and lost way

Footing insecure

Broken and defeated

We must brace ourselves

To rise again

For no matter how often we fall

We must rise to the challenge

To the day

To face our enemies

Because that is the meaning of life

The rise and fall

The give and take

Without which

We cannot live

#lost, #ground, #way, #broken, #defeated, #brace, #ourselves, #rise, #fall, #challenge, #day, #face, #enemies, #meaning, #life, #give, #take, #poem, #poetry

Lies

Lies

Do promises made at midnight

Mean nothing in the light of day?

Did you not swear by look and by deed?

I believed you when you said

You would be faithful

Was it all lies?

The moonlight was so beautiful

It cast a spell over us

Made me a romantic

Took me for a fool

I think we need to take time

To reassess this relationship

Maybe we were never meant to be

#promises, #midnight, #nothing, #light, #day, #swear, #look, #deed, #believed, #said, #faithful, #lies, #moonlight, #beautiful, #cast, #spell, #made, #romantic, #fool, #time, #reassess, #relationship, #nevermeanttobe, #poem, #poetry 

Hopeless

Leave me, I beg you

I can’t stand this pain

You are low hanging fruit

Just there, but not quite ready

Everyone’s but never mine

A light of love, a will-o-the-wisp

Never seriously anything at all

One day you will be

But it won’t be with me

I’m not worthy of attention

I lack more then I possess

So one day they’ll come to take me

Many loving fans, I guess

Not really, nobody cares

I’ve been told that often enough

And if you hear it often enough

You begin to believe it

Maybe I worship the ground that you walk on

Because the one I walk on is tainted

Black as sin and just as gritty

You walk on air and you know it

I falling through cracks in the pavements

Wrecked and hopeless am I

#leave, #beg, #stand, #pain, #low, #hanging, #fruit, #ready, #everyones, #mine, #lightoflove, #willothewisp, #seriously, #day, #worthy, #attention, #lack, #possess, #take, #loving, #really, #nobodycares, #often, #told, #believe, #ground, #worship, #walk, #tainted, #blackassin, #gritty, #air, #falling, #cracks, #pavement, #wrecked, #hopeless,

The Quest

Never ceasing

Always seeking

Never giving up

No matter what

Never standing still

No, not until

The quest

Is resolve

Should never get involved

With you whole heart

Time to start

Heading for home

Not far to roam

Lead astray

For a year and a day

#ceasing, #seeking, #givingup, #matter, #standing, #quest, #resolve, #involved, #whole, #heart, #start, #home, #roam, #astray, #year, #day

Update on Family History

I first post this on my Tumblr.  This is a follow up to that post.

So UPDATE on my family History:

I sort of hit a brick wall.  A few in fact.  One line, I can trace all the way back.  Or at least back, as far as, I feel like going,(as far as records go).  About Mayflower era is far as I feel like going though.  However, there are the distaff lines.  For those of you not familiar(ah, the old jokes are the best), Distaff means the female, matriarchal line.  That is the harder line to follow because, duh, different names.  I did hit gold because my family founded a town. This book had all the information. Then, because it was a small town and travel was limited, well, you can guess.  But if you go far back enough in anyone’s family tree it stops branching, especially if you have royal blood.  All those tales about mad kings and vampires came from genetic diseases and intermarrying.  My German relatives came from Ludwigs and Gepharts, Dauberman, Haufner, Wilcox, Day, REIFSNIDER and Winters and are surprisingly English and Welsh! The English and Welsh surnames are Glidwell Pennington, Colley, Wilson, King, Bennet and Woodhead, Kaye , Hill, Harrison, Sharpe, Foster. On the Swedish Side they are Polheumus, Schenck, Covenhaven, Moonfort.  Then on the side I KNEW was mixed, I traced back a couple of generations of one grandfather but the trouble I had was there was a father who named two of his sons the same first name with different initials after his father had done the same thing so there were potentially four Raymond Lunt’s of the same approximate age.  They also had all been born in Massachusetts. I cannot find a marriage certificate for his wife which according to my mom is Mabel Oakes?   Then I find a war Pension Paper which lists an alias as Charles W. Stoccard as an alias for a Charles W. Lunt.  Several spots on the paper look erased.  The birth place matches(Maine).  There is a family story that he changed his birth date so he could fight. However I did find other relatives to trace from HIS father’s line.

So from of the four lines I figured I had to trace, I had two dead end, one total shocker, then back to the begining. 

On the Polish side, I figured that I wouldn’t be able to get too far.  I knew that either my grandparents or Great-grandparents were literally off the boat, or once you hit the boat you’re kind of out of luck, especially with the language barrier.  I had had extreme luck with English records because they had taken Censuses as far back as 1841 and once the Protestants settled down Church records were pretty much left alone.  I did find what I believe to be a marriage license on my great-grandmother’s side.  You would think that it would be easy to trace polish names because of the uniqueness. Unfortunately, when my relatives arrived in this country they were not educated.  There were portion of Poland that were not as well off as the rest and still under the nominal control of Russia.  Also, until 13^th century only the Noble families used last names.  Even as late as WWII, many families still didn’t use last names.  I did trace some of the one side although my Aunt has told me that she has the whole thing because a cousin went to Ellis Island and did it.  I know that there are a lot of Zalot’s out there. Hi, Family!  The Cisek’s were the interesting ones.  I found very little but I know my Grandfather had definitely changed his name for business.  I do know that at the time he was on the Forbe’s list for something.  He had a barrel business and managed a minor league baseball team.  He had the opportunity to play in the majors but turned it down because it didn’t pay enough.  He would have played around the same time as Babe Ruth.  I know he had gone by name along the lines of Shezzer or Ceazzer?  There was a story but somehow I managed to block it out. There are some Polish and Austrasia and Hungarian records available online translated.  The problem comes when translating Cyrillic to any Romance language.  Certain letters have no equivalencies.  Sorry, I went off on a tangent there, I like linguistics.  It’s amazing that one of the first things that we learn in a foreign language is curse words.  I may not speak many languages, but I can curse in about 6! 

So that is my update on my family tree.  I started out in one place and end up somewhere I didn’t really expect.  But isn’t that life?  You never end up where you start out to go but it’s where you needed to be.